Your Mother, Felicity Merriman
by VioletRose136
Summary: Before his death in 1821, Ben writes a letter to his only daugther, Cassandra, describing his undying love for his first and only wife, Cassandra's late Mother, Felicity Merriman.


_March 30__th__ 1821_

_Boston, Massachusetts_

_My Dearest Daughter,_

_I can sense that my death is near, and because of this, I wish to tell you the story of your Mother, and myself. I have never spoken of your Mother, unless I needed to. I am terrified to admit. You are so much like her, I was startled. _

_Your Mother's name was Felicity Merriman, which, changed to Davidson when we married, on June 25__th__ 1780. Your Mother was sixteen when we married, the daughter of a well-respected Williamsburg storekeeper: Edward Merriman, and his wife, Martha Merriman, Felicity was the eldest child, she had two sisters, and one brother, Polly, Nancy (we fondly called her Nan) and William. _

_I met your Mother when I was but fifteen years old in the summer of 1774. I was originally from Yorktown; my Father was a coal smith, and my Mother a housewife, I had one sister: Elizabeth, who was married long before I came to Williamsburg. When I first came to Williamsburg, I thought I would live there for the rest of my life. Find a wife, and settle down. _

_I was such a shy, timid thing back then. Your Mother brought out, me. When I came to Williamsburg, I had recently had an engagement broken, something I never told your Mother. I was worried that I was just, unlikable, I suppose. But, through your Mother's beloved, late horse, Penny we become friends, and then, after the war, lovers. _

_Throughout the war, Felicity and I exchanged many letters. I have included them here, I hope you will understand that I loved your Mother dearly, she was beautiful, with startling red hair, and green eyes, emerald green eyes, our love was always there, but was slowly unravelled through those letters, you will find that they go from merely friendly, and open to passionate and private. _

_Your Mother was lively and never truly meant for this world. She loved running and riding horses, and despised sitting still. When she was only nine years old, she saved her Penny, stealing my best trousers and going riding in them. She was insane to do so, I thought. But now, thinking back, upon it, just by saying that, you can understand what a wonderful woman your Mother was. _

_I returned from the war in May, and wasted no time in asking Edward Merriman, you're Grandfather, for his eldest daughters' hand in marriage, he agreed, willingly, saying 'I would not have promised her to any man, but yourself, Benjamin Davidson,' I bought your Mother a very simple ring, it was a gold base, with an emerald in it. _

_I proposed to her in a field, where we often rode together, flowers where in bloom, and it was like a scene from a dream. I dipped down on one knee, holding her hand in mine and from my waistcoat pocket withdrew the ring box, and spoke, 'Felicity Merriman, I promise to love and care for you forever, in return will do me the honour of becoming my wife?'. She laughed with joy and agreed._

_We where married in the church in Williamsburg, she wore a cream satin gown; it had been her Mother's. Her hair was in a French braid, curled around her head. A think veil covered her face, can remember her ring, it was braided, and replaced her engagement ring on her finger. Though she was buried with both her rings on, the clearest moment of my life, is pushing back her veil to reveal her face, and slowly, carefully tipping her lips up to mine, as the Minister proclaimed us man and wife. _

_We went on a three week honeymoon to Felicity's Grandfather's plantation, and it was there, my beautiful, that you where conceived. Your Mother did not know that she was with child when we left the Plantation, but I believe she had her suspicions. She was sure of it about three weeks after we returned. It was joyful news, and everyone rejoiced. _

_Whilst she was with child, Felicity would often sew, or sing whilst cleaning the house. But early on in her pregnancy, she began to have difficulties. Widow Thompson, her midwife, put her on strict bed rest. But when the time came for her to bore the child—you—the difficulties had weakened her greatly. She struggled to give birth, and eventually she did, her womb burst from trying to expel the child to early, and she died from blood loss. But she gave you to me, her greatest gift, and for that, I am eternally grateful to her. Her last words where quoting the Virgin Mother; 'I am here, Lord' _

_Your name, Cassandra, is unusual, and rarely used, but for her own reasons, your Mother found it to be the most beautiful name she had ever heard. She planned on naming you Emily or Edward after her Father if you where a boy, but I knew that she really wanted to name you Cassandra, and so, in her honour, I did, Cassandra Emily Davidson, Thomas now, I suppose. I believe that your husband is a wonderful match. _

_The day was bleak, when her coffin was carried through the streets. People who had loved the fiery Merriman girl, sobbed. I was frozen after that, carrying you whilst we followed the coffin to the graveyard. She was buried, and her headstone read: '_Felicity Merriman Davidson April 12th 1764-March 23rd 1781, Beloved daughter, Mother, and Wife'_. I stood there, numbly, when people threw their handfuls of soil over her coffin, they spoke a few words. But I didn't, I let the soil run from my hand. Falling onto the coffin, the coffin, containing the corpse of a woman who I had known from a young age, and would forever love. _

_We left Williamsburg soon after her death, when you where only three months old, I took you to Boston, where I had some family who hadn't known your Mother. Who could help me raise you to become the proud gentlewoman you are today. I am so proud of you, my Cassandra, so, so, proud of you. _

_Why did I leave Williamsburg, and never speak to her family again? It was too painful, Felicity greatly resembled her Mother, it was too painful to look at her Mother, her family, be around places where she had laughed, and played. I never spoke to the Merriman's again, but I suppose that they probably still live in Williamsburg. Polly is probably still alive, William too, your Grandparents' probably died awhile ago. I'm sorry, that I never told you about your Mother. But, you can rest well with the knowledge that she was mourned by myself for a lifetime. I never married again, and you are my only daughter, my only child. _

_I am joyful for death. I shall be with your Mother soon, and so because of this, I must say goodbye, my love, _

_Your loving Father, _

_Benjamin Davidson_


End file.
